as Elton John sang......'I'm still standing........
Hi all, long time since I've spoken to you all. I keep intending to come on here but I run out of energy, things take so much time now, there's never enough day left at the end of my energy, well you know what I mean!
Thinks have changed quite dramatically since I moved to Wells. I am living in a lovely retirement house, a lot less classy than the previous one but it's so friendly, I love it!
Believe it or not my divorce & house sale are still dragging on but I've stopped worrying about it. My ex & I swing from dislike to loathe to vague friendship & back very rapidly, but the finishing block is in sight now, then I really will be able to put the past where it belongs.
Generally life has become very easy. It would even be calm if it wasn't for my disaster prone effect on everything I touch!
I now have a social workers as well as having my old PA back helping me. Life would be really good if the depression could be sent packing. I am suffering with it quite badly but in a very strange way. I can be really happy, not high, just nicely happy then can drop like a stone over a few minutes! I've tried to get help from my GG but he's not really worried about it. Of course he still hasn't received my notes from previous doctors so doesn't know how dangerous it can be to ignore, unfortunately I always seem to be fairly well when I see him, mind you, the fact that You can't get an appointment for a week doesn't help!
I'm having a lot of health problems too & am forward & back to the hospitals but I've become so chilled out about it that you'd never believe there was a problem.
One of the down sides to my depression is that I'm spending huge amounts of money that I haven't got, in the past couple of months I've bought a £2000+ mobility scooter, another rise and recline chair, a kindle fire, an Ipad2, an expensive juicer, new standard light & a special crystal costing £45! Lots more smaller things too. I've told gp but he seems to think that I should just stop it, but I can't, it only happens during low periods. It's lovely to have nice things but it's scared wondering what I'll do if the house sale falls through, but hey ho , that's life! I compensate for spending so much by giving away all sorts of things, mainly to charity. I just feel that it's not important anymore. It makes me feel good at the time.
It's bizarre though that unless you are weeping & wailing and threatening suicide, no one worries, even when you ask for help, you are ignored. My digestion issues have also got worse but I live now on almost no meals, just cake and chocolate , I know how bad it is but it's scrummy!
I've found a tai chi class again & also started an aqua class for disabled last week. I keep seeing other courses & classes I'd like to do but I'm tring not to overdo it, I certainly don't want a repetition of last year.
Out of my mass spends, one thing has really paid for itself, my Ipad, it's wonderful! It's so easy to use, is light, it's perfect to pick up & put down rather than getting tied to a computer screen, but better than all that, I now talk to my 10yr old granddaughter on Skype each week & my brother and his family on FaceTime, whenever I want. I can't believe how great it is!
So it's really a roller coaster but in a different way than before. There's lots more to tell but I'll leave it for another time.
I hope that you are all keeping fairly well in this gloomy, freezing cold winter, so keep warm & remind yourselves that spring is just around the corner, & everything seems better then!
Take care all, hope to speak again soon
Hugs to all
Cobweb xxx